A brain game.
I am a writer who loves films to find inspiration. So, I use them as an excuse for "doing research" in the name of making them valuable in my process of creative writing. Somehow, as a complicated, thoughtful and restless person, I considered everything: how the storytelling is made, how the script develops, and how the director’s vision is epitomizing the whole character world, combining with the staging, colors, wardrobe, picture composition, and illumination, among others. It's a totally fun trip. In this process, some movies are worth it, and others are really agony waiting to the end just to give the benefit of the doubt. In this exploration of find inspiration, I enter into this disruption of the space-time continuum, like Groundhog Day because is not what I see it is what I am expecting to see.
It is clear that all the stories I see talk about a crucial moment in the life of a character who struggles with a life change. Almost 85% finished with a character achieving the goal or purpose. In my journey, life tussles me most of the time. I am just a visionary and woman of Faith, who thinks and believes that one day everything is going to be better than I imagined. I don’t get used to giving up so easily. It is interesting that, on this journey, we are spectators—story-watchers in both movies and in our own life stories. The loop, space time continuum “Groundhog Day” moment.
In the present, when I am stuck dealing with so much, I literally flow like a ghost crossing the wall. In this mind game, it brings up this question: Am I sleepwalking or am I the only one awake? Confusing thought, I know. Let me explain.
When all the randomness and awkward moments turn upside down, in that precise moment, you feel that you are the only person who sees what is really happening while others just stay quiet, move slowly, or really don't want to take action. In my professional life, I accept that my colleagues, most of the time, don’t understand me. Make me feel like I don't get it or am out of line. Now, I understand why that happened. My mind goes so fast that I pass all the possibilities in seconds, starting to reject them as the first normal thoughts, so when I talk or express an strong idea, it is a little out of the box. My problem in that moment was my form of conjugating the words, which resulted in confusion.
Life is the same thing. The universe drops opportunities in minusculely "perfect things" that we usually miss when we are stubborn and unsatisfied for some “valuable” reason. In my case, when I don’t miss, those tiny, perfect things make me confident that I am going in the right direction. When I get it, my words flow at just the right time.
Well, the rest of the time is like the same effort, trying to define a strategy and create opportunities to be successful somehow. That is when the Groundhog Day concept comes to mind. As a writer and story watcher, I feel that I am in the fourth dimension, but I am living like a shadow in the third. Something is hiding from me, and I can't see it. It usually happens when we are stuck, incapable, or miserable in a dark moment; this is exactly when we start seeing clearly and understanding our path. Every situation brings change and depends on how we look or how others have an encouraging or killing opinion. Sometimes we are reckless with our own paths.
The way I see it, it is a swing in how we were programmed to react to circumstances according to our influences, values, experiences, and individuality. Of course, everyone knows that. What maybe you don’t know is that our path needs to synchronize with all. When we understand who we are, what we are good at, and what we need to work on, everything starts to flow, step by step. even if we spend more than 30 years trying to figure it out.
A temporary anomaly is a term used in science. This is a time-travel concept that I am writing about and am always lost in translation but love to read. Visualize it as a “creation of alternate timelines” that changes with every decision and state. Sometimes we delay or advance our path. I would like to call it "Bridge." When we achieve or pass that bridge, we cross a dimension—an intellect and awareness dimension. Passing through makes me more spirited, confident, and patient in every endeavor.
I am always saying, “I want to be a writer,” but unless I don’t have my first book, it makes me feel like I am not. When I see my actions in the last 5 years, I have been writing all the time. It’s a feeling of incompletion, but it's just how we are “positioning in life"—the crystal ball in which we see everything. So, in this temporary anomaly, if suddenly I clicked (I wake up),... I am a writer figuring out my experience translating in my writing. So, the real deal is that I create my timeline with the same positioning. From now on, I will not minimize any effort or hard work that results in not being so good. Every step I take is for my own process to maximizing my potential, then have impact in others.